‘I was really happy to be in a committed relationship. But then I got first-hand experience of men and I was cheated on.
‘I was devastated and couldn’t believe the same thing had happened to me as my mum’.
Jenny had her first affair with a married man whose wife was pregnant. She says she felt it was a revelation. She has now dated nine men who are all married. She says being the other woman is flattering
I finds it ‘flattering’ to be chosen over their wives … NO husband can be trusted
Jenny Hendle, 36, from Tunbridge Wells, has no interest in single men
Mother-of-two will only date men who already have wives
Jenny believes all men are cheats because of her parent’s relationship
Tells her 15-year-old daughter ‘all men are the same’
A mother-of-two has revealed she has chosen to only date married men – not to wreck marriages but because she feels no man can be trusted.
Jenny Hendle, 36, from Tunbridge Wells, Kent, is a serial dater with a difference – she refuses to give single guys the time of day.
Twice-divorced Jenny has already dated nine married men – and says she feels no guilt about seeing other women’s husbands.
Twice-divorced Jenny, posing above with some who did not wish to be identified, has already happily dated nine married men – and says she feels absolutley no guilt about seeing other women’s husbands
Jenny Hendle, above, 36, from Tunbridge Wells, has no interest in single men. Instead the mum of two says she will only date married men. She does this because she says that no man can be trusted as they are all cheats
The bakery worker said: ‘I believe there are no loyal and honest men, they don’t exist. I have no interest in dating single men who will promise me the world then cheat on me.
‘When I start to date a married man there is never any pretense of falling in love or long-term commitment.
‘I know that at the end of the day he will go home to his wife and I’m happy that I will go home alone with no strings attached.
‘My relationships with married men don’t get complicated. That’s the way I like it.’
She added: ‘If a man wants an affair they couldn’t wish for a better experience than with me.’
Jenny, who has been on various holidays with her married lovers, believes her open attitude makes her the perfect mistress. Her reputation is such has even been approached by her friends’ husbands
Growing up, Jenny believed in true love and commitment – however, she said that as she got old she ‘realised it was all a fantasy’.
She said: ‘As a teenager I saw my dad persistently cheat on my mum. It was heartbreaking. We all knew it was happening and it broke my mum’s heart.
‘The confrontations it caused were awful. I grew up accepting that this is how men behave.’
Jenny had her first serious romance at 15, when she started dating a 21-year-old professional athlete.
She said: ‘I was really happy to be in a committed relationship. But then I got first-hand experience of men and I was cheated on.
‘I was devastated and couldn’t believe the same thing had happened to me as my mum.
Jenny, who met first husband at 17 said: ‘As a teenager I saw my dad persistently cheat on my mum. It was heartbreaking. I grew up accepting that this is how men behave’
‘My friends would tell me they were being cheated on too. My early experience of men made me wary.’
At the age of 17, Jenny met the 36-year-old man who would become her first husband.
However the relationship eventually fell apart and their divorce was finalised in 2001. Jenny then went on to have the first of her two daughters, who is now 15.
‘I see her going through teen heart break already. As a mother I want her protected from cheaters.’
She recalls: ‘After my first divorce I was sad but was determined not to let it affect future relationships.’
In 2003 she fell for a 38-year-old company director and says: ‘This time I thought it was different.’
The couple dated for five years, during which time Jenny had her second daughter, who is now 12.
They married in 2008 but despite her husband remaining faithful, sadly the relationship didn’t work out and the pair divorced three years later.
After her second divorce and having to constantly hear of her friends being cheated on, Jenny made the decision to give up on men.
She explained: ‘Dating in today’s society has changed, it is so dishonest and I didn’t want to be part of it.
‘I realised it is in the male nature to behave this way and firmly believe there’s no such thing as a faithful man.
‘I’m not a man hater – I just don’t think men are made to be with one woman. So I don’t want to try and be in a relationship if it will end in cheating.’
For this reason, four years ago, Jenny made the decision to only date other women’s husbands.
She said: ‘As soon as I decided this in my mind it all made sense and I never looked back. The first married man I met was in December 2011 at a club.
In 2003 she fell for a 38-year-old company director and says: ‘This time I thought it was different.’ The couple dated for five years, during which time Jenny had her second daughter, who is now 12
‘We got chatting and he asked me out. He told me he was married and that his wife was pregnant but that she wasn’t interested in sex. I was surprised that I felt 100 per cent okay with what I was being told.
‘I actually felt more in control because I knew he was married and his wife was pregnant.
‘It meant I didn’t have to give him my heart.
‘His work in security, doing overnight watches on building sites, meant he was often away from home.
‘So when my kids went to see their dads, I’d see him. We dated for four months. Being with him gave me a sense of control.
‘It was so much better than dating single men as I had a satisfaction of knowing this man would not go behind my back.’
Jenny has not looked back since. She said: ‘Being the other woman, not only do you know where you stand, it’s flattering that you have been chosen over his wife.
After her second divorce and having to constantly hear of her friends being cheated on, Jenny made the decision to give up on men. Now she says it is the nature of men to cheat and believes that no man is faithful
‘I never feel guilty doing what I’m doing, it takes two to tango. I don’t set out to ruin someone’s relationship.
‘I feel sad for their wives that their husband is doing this but if he wasn’t doing it with me, he would be off doing it with someone else.
‘Why should I be criticised for dating a man who is married? I’m unattached, he’s the one having an affair, not me.
‘My friends see where I’m coming from as they’ve known me for years and know I’ve been treated badly by men. They don’t judge me but they don’t all agree with what I’m doing.’
Jenny has no plans to settle down in a long-term relationship.
She admitted: ‘They are just flings. I enjoy them because it is exciting, but I don’t have to worry about the future. The risk of getting hurt is so much lower.’
There has been one occasion, however, that Jenny has fallen for one of her ‘flings’.
While Jenny claims she feels sad for the wives of the men she sleeps with, she says if it wasn’t her it would be someone else. She claims to feel good about being ‘chosen over’ the wives and never feels guilty
She said: ‘We were in the Territorial Army together and he was married. I began to develop feelings for him and we became much closer than I planned. A year in, he told me he would leave his wife for me and I panicked.
‘I left the TA and we lost contact.’
Now Jenny meets married men when she is out and claims they approach her.
She said: ‘I don’t date every married man I meet, I turn a lot down.
Why should I be criticised for dating a man who is married? I’m unattached, he’s the one having an affair, not me
‘Usually we just get chatting at a bar or online then arrange a date. I know they are married as they wear a ring or tell me from the start.
‘We go for dinners out, sometimes for weekends away and enjoy all the benefits of a relationship without commitment.’
Jenny has rules when it comes to her unusual personal life.
She said: ‘I would never play too close to home and I would never betray a friend.
‘I’ve had friends’ husbands approach me, but I would never do that. I also don’t introduce them to my children. They are not part of my family.
‘Some of the men I have dated have had previous affairs where the mistress has turned ‘bunny boiler’ and tried to ruin their life.
For now Jenny said she cannot imagine a future with a committed man, accepting she will be happy always being the other woman. She added: ”I’m happy, they’re happy and the wife is none the wiser’
‘They threaten to tell their wives or become too attached. I don’t want to do that.’
Jenny claims she would never cheat on one of her dates. She said: ‘When I am in a relationship I’m 100 per cent committed, I never date two married men at once.’
Her view on men has now rubbed off on her daughters.
Jenny added: ‘My 15-year-old already has been heartbroken over boyfriends cheating on her. I can’t help but tell her all men are the same.’
For now Jenny said she cannot imagine a future with a committed man, accepting she will be happy always being the other woman.
She added: ‘It doesn’t matter if it’s a fling or an ongoing thing, I’ve been involved in relationships with married men that have lasted years or days, it’s all the same for me.
‘I’m happy, they’re happy and the wife is none the wiser – and what they don’t know can’t harm them.’
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